Around My House (Vases)

You will find many vases throughout our house. We love vases - all colors and shapes, the more unusual the better.

The first four photos are from vase collections in our living room.

This set is out on the screened porch.

This gorgeous blue one is in our bedroom...

along with this one...

and this one. I love the white.

I've shown this one on a previous blog, but I just love it! I think it's unusual and I love the colors and the birds.

This one is also in the spare room. The owl doesn't exactly match the bird theme, but it was close enough and so cute that I had to have it!

Since Logan is in his teens now, we don't have to worry as much about things getting broken. We have had a few accidents with leaning the recliner back and hitting a bookshelf on which some of our vases are displayed. We've broken two or three that same way! We now really try to keep the recliner pulled further away from that bookshelf! The cats have broken a couple, as well, with their incessant jumping around.

We just love to decorate with vases. We change them out occasionally. In fact, I think there are two or three in our yard sale pile right now!

I Love This Boy

Oh my goodness. If you know anything about me at all, you know that Artie & Logan are my life. I am so blessed to be a mom, and I thank God for that every day. For several years I didn't think I could get pregnant at all, and then just when we gave up, God intervened.
I remember when I told Artie that I thought I was pregnant. We bought four pregnancy tests and I took them all. We still didn't want to tell anyone until I had been to the doctor to confirm. Artie called his parents since they are out of state. I told mine at their house on my sister's birthday in December. I made a Christmas tree ornament with a little plastic baby inside a tiny open box. The box lid said "Merry Christmas, You're Going to be Grandparents." Everyone cried, even my Dad.
While I was pregnant, of course I mainly hoped for a healthy baby, but I did want a boy. I always said I wanted him to have Artie's good looks and my brains. When we found out it was a boy, we were very excited.
We decorated the nursery with a Noah's Ark theme, and Artie & I hand-painted an ark and some animals on the wall of our apartment. It was quite beautiful, even if we did do it ourselves!
From the moment he was born, he was my miracle child. We didn't send him to the nursery for our two nights in the hospital. We couldn't bear for him to be out of our sight. They took him to circumcise him and I was pacing the floor, ready for them to bring him back.
I won't tell you his entire life story in this post, but fast-forward 13 years to the present day. Logan is the joy of my life. He can make me laugh, make me cry, make me angry, and make me smile faster than anyone else on the earth. He definitely has my sarcastic sense of humor, and we totally have inside jokes. Sometimes Artie looks at us like we are aliens. And sometimes Artie is the subject of our jokes. :)

When I get home from work in the evenings, I stop by Logan's room on my way to change clothes. He always says "Hey, Mom." If he says "Dad didn't take his medicine today," then I know Artie's in a bad mood. LOL If he says, "How was your day?" or stops playing xbox long enough to ask how the boss treated me that day, then I know he usually wants something.
He knows how to talk me into just about anything. He also knows where I keep my purse and which pocket my money is in. He knows how to use my credit card to order pizza online, but he can't figure out how to flush the toilet ...?

This boy is the center of our world. He knows it, too. He loves being a spoiled only child, but he loves his parents and his family. He is so gentle and caring with his 2-year-old cousin. He rolls his eyes when his 6-year-old cousin says she's going to marry him, but he holds her hand and walks with her anyway. (while we all crack up)

He has been known to give away his toys and games to less fortunate friends. He wants to volunteer at the homeless shelter or the food pantry. He worries about Mom being alone at night. He worries when someone in our family is struggling and wants to make sure they have food and money. He has a very kind heart - but he hides it if he wants to act cool. If I want to know how I REALLY look in an outfit - Logan is the one to ask. "You look fat, Mom, don't wear that." "That color is gross." "Why is your hair so yellow today?" "Mom, that is SO not cool." "Please don't answer the door in your pajamas if my friends come over!"
He goes to all the school dances (which I never did except senior prom) and goofs off with his friends. He could eat five pizzas in a row and not bat an eye. And he sleeps with two cats who are his babies. He could easily go on "Last Comic Standing" and win the grand prize.
The early teen years are not always the fun ones for parents or kids. But thank God that we have a close-knit family and a son who still talks to us and is not embarrassed to say "I love you" even in front of his friends.
I love this boy. He is still my miracle child. I do everything in my power to make his life fun and happy and secure. I am so glad God chose me to be his mom. I love this boy!!

Girlfriend-Challenged

I have yet another flaw to share with the blogosphere. I am a terrible girlfriend to have, so I am girlfriend-challenged.

Many women of all ages and walks of life seem to thrive on their relationships with their girlfriends. They have girls’ nights out, they do lunch or dinner, they go to movies in groups, they talk on the phone every day, etc. If they have big news or a secret, the first people they want to call are their girlfriends. I am all for friendship, and I do have some friends I am close with that happen to be females. However, I am just not into the whole girlfriends routine. Don’t get me wrong – I don’t think it’s a bad thing or that there is anything wrong with having good girlfriends. It’s just not for me.

I have a few, very few, close friends in my life. I choose to devote all my time to my family when I am not chained to my desk at the sweatshop. And by family, I am mostly referring to Artie & Logan. I would rather go shopping or go to a movie or dinner with Artie than anyone else. I would rather talk to Artie about my problems or victories than anyone else. And if I need to talk to someone about Artie, I always have my therapist. ;) Logan can make me laugh faster than anyone else on earth. And he is already 13 – time is flying by and I don’t want to spend a moment away from him that I could be enjoying him and the ... ummm, “joys” of his personality. I realize my unusual attachment to my husband and son maybe makes me weird, or a freak, or boring, but I don’t really care. It does make me a bad girlfriend, because I don't call often enough or spend enough time doing girl stuff.

This is not to detract in any way from the special friends I do have. There is Sara, my best friend, who works with me at the sweatshop and shares my most stressful situation day in and day out. I feel like we have bonded as many soldiers do in war. The sheer stress of our situation has made us close, as if we have survived some monumental battle together. There is very little she doesn’t know about me, and she is always there for me, as I try to be for her. She is a great friend and I love her dearly. But I rarely spend any time with her away from the office. Our friendship has been forged in 10-minute increments over the 10 years we have worked together.

There is my sister, Kristi, who is my very close friend and confidante. We share our history and our family and the parenting of only children. We are close in age and philosophy. And the best thing about Kristi, besides that we’re blood, is that we can be brutally honest with each other. We email every day, but I maybe see her once a month, if that.

There are others: Candice, who lives 500 miles away now; Teresa, whom I rarely see, but feel as if we’re still close; Lula, who has a different way of life than I have, but we are bonded together with a genuine love for each other and a shared sense of humor; Janice, who has been my friend for almost 30 years; my sister-in-law and niece, Patti & Deann, whom I love dearly and don’t see often enough. I’m sure I am forgetting someone major…

My point is, even though I love these women, I never want anything to take away my precious time with Artie & Logan. Throughout our almost 25 years of marriage, Artie and I have never had “his friends” and “her friends.” We’ve never gone out for “boys’ nights” and “girls’ nights.” We do everything together, and we like it that way.

Sara & I went for a scrapbooking weekend once in Pigeon Forge. This was some of my absolute favorite things all combined: Sara, scrapbooking, other friends from the scrap store, a fabulous cabin in the mountains, lots of junk food, a hot tub, and no office work to do. We had a good time and got lots of scrapping done. But I had to come home early. I missed Artie & Logan so bad that I just couldn’t stand it! Artie said he was miserable, too.

Kristi & Mom always want me to go shopping with them or go for a girls’ dinner. I love Kristi & Mom! I really do! But I’d prefer to bring Artie along.

I’ve been burned by friends. I’ve been hurt and stabbed in the back. Confidences betrayed, talked about behind my back, made fun of … but who hasn’t? That’s just a part of life. The friends that I mentioned earlier, I would trust them with my life. And every once in a while, I will go out for dinner with them or for a pedicure or a movie. Just last week I spent an hour on the phone with Candice. I jump for joy when I get to see Teresa. And I love it when Lula or anyone else comments on my Facebook or blog or emails me.

I just don’t want to give up any Artie & Logan time. I'm VERY selfish about that!

I fully realize that some of my blogs and admissions do not put me in the best light. It’s about being honest and being real. This is how I have lived my life up until now, without a posse of girlfriends, and I guess it’s how I’ll continue. Especially since I’m probably ticking off the friends I do have. I'm sorry I'm not a good girlfriend!

Parenting Fail Update

Several weeks ago I wrote about Logan's weight issue and how we were removing all junk food from the house. We did this in an attempt to help him (and us) eat more nutritious foods and lose weight. However, after approximately six weeks without snacks, Logan has not lost a single pound. He is frustrated and we are at a loss.
He recently had to make a small project for school and I found it in his agenda book. It was a shirt-shaped paper that had been colored in with pencils, and around the collar and sleeves they apparently had to write things about themselves. Logan had written "smart" and "funny" and a couple of other positive words, but at the bottom he had written "obese." I cried when I saw it.
So we have now taken another step in our plan of action to help our son. We have scheduled him for sessions with a personal trainer. We are already members at the YMCA, and they offer personal training for an additional cost. Artie believes that the a trainer will push Logan and motivate him more than we can by just taking him to the Y and working out with him. Logan's first session is later this week.
We will NOT let this issue win. We will figure out a way to help Logan and to protect his self-esteem as much as possible in the process.
I will continue to keep you posted....

Therapy

I have been seeing a therapist, otherwise known as a licensed psychologist, off and on since 1994, but for the past five years I have seen the same therapist either once a week or once every two weeks. Her name is Saroj and she is magnificent.
The idea of therapy seems to frighten a lot of people. My mom won’t go because she doesn’t want someone to know “all of her secrets.” Mom prefers to stuff everything down inside and put a smile on until it all bubbles up and explodes. I’m not of that mindset myself.
Other people are afraid of therapists because they assume they will lie on a sofa and be hypnotized or otherwise “tricked” into talking about things they really don’t want to talk about. Some don’t “believe” in therapy, either because they think it’s a bunch of hogwash or they believe that only God can heal your mind. I’ve heard many excuses from all different types of people as to why they would never go to a therapist.
For me personally, therapy has been a tremendous gift. I honestly believe that when my family physician referred me to Saroj, she is the therapist that God chose for me. God can perform His healing through other people, like doctors and nurses and therapists. I have been comfortable with her since the first session, and now it’s almost like we’re old girlfriends catching up when we meet. Through our sessions, I have become a stronger person and able to handle much more stress and emotional upheaval than I could handle before.
What is a therapy session like? Well, with Saroj it’s like sitting in someone’s den and having a chat. She has a desk in her office and a filing cabinet, but there is also a sofa and a very comfy armchair, which is where I sit. She sits in her desk chair and we face each other from across the room and just talk. She asks about anything major going on in my life and we talk about that. Sometimes we talk about my lingering grief over Dad’s death. Sometimes we talk about my worries as a mom and parenting issues with Logan. Sometimes we talk about my relationship with Mom or Kristi. Sometimes (often!) we talk about work stress and how I can stand up to a very difficult and demanding boss. She relates to me stories from her own life or the lives of other clients that help me see my situation in a different light. She tells me it’s okay to feel the way I do, or maybe that I shouldn’t feel the way I do. She helped me deal with the emotional fallout from having gastric bypass surgery and changing my body image. She helps me deal with the routine family issues that arise in all of our lives every day. Most of all, she helps me see the best Kim inside me, underneath all the negative things I tell myself every day.
If I have a freak-out moment during the week, I can email or call her. If I have something wonderful to tell her, I can email or call her. She came to the funeral home when Dad died. She has met Artie & Logan, and even saw Logan a couple of times because I was worried about his self-esteem and shyness. I have referred many people to her office.

I think my positive experience with therapy may cause me to be a little bit biased, but I think everyone should have a therapist, at least during transition times in life. It is so helpful and such a relief to talk to someone, an objective listener, who is trained and knows about emotions and how the brain works.
I was diagnosed with depression many years ago. At first I too thought it was hogwash and I wanted my family doctor to keep testing me and find out what was REALLY wrong, not just some mental diagnosis that he “made up.” Artie convinced me to try the doctor’s advice and start medication and see a therapist, which I did. After I saw how it worked, I became a believer. Some days I still get really down & out for no apparent reason, and my depression is affected by the change in seasons. I stay more depressed in the winter than in the spring & summer because of the shorter days and less sunlight. Apparently this is a common phenomenon.
I used to be embarrassed to have a depression diagnosis. I didn’t want anyone to know I was on medication (originally Prozac, now on Cymbalta for about three years). But where is the shame in being honest? We all struggle with something. I think it has been a combination of prayer and faith, medication, support from my family & friends, and my amazing therapist that I am in the place I am today.

Couponing

I recently tried couponing again after watching the “Extreme Couponing” show on TLC. (Me & about 100,000 other people, apparently). I have tried it in the past without much success, but I thought wow, if I could pay $10.00 a week for groceries instead of $200.00, that could be some serious savings or spending money!

I bought a 3-ring binder and some divider tabs. I ordered some of those shiny baseball-card display pages to hold my coupons. I subscribed to couponmom.com and coupons.com to get updates on the latest coupons and matchups. I carefully reviewed each week’s grocery store fliers to compare what was on sale to the coupons I had on hand. I pored over each week’s coupon inserts, clipped them out, and printed additional online coupons galore. I sorted them and neatly filed them away in my coupon binder, all nice & neat and divided into categories.

And there they stayed. In the coupon binder.

Which I never remembered to take with me.

The main thing I learned during this most recent couponing experiment is that it takes TOO MUCH TIME!! It takes time to review the coupons and look at the matchups provided online. It takes time to actually clip the coupons out. It takes time to sort them and file them in the neat little binder. And it takes much longer in the grocery store when you have to look for certain brands and sizes that match your coupons. It takes time to drive to two or three different stores to get what is on sale at each store. It takes time to read and memorize the coupon policies of each store (many of which have recently changed due to the overwhelming response to the “Extreme Couponing” show).

It’s not that I don’t have extra time. I mean, I have previously blogged about how much time I waste watching TV or being lazy at home on weekends. It’s just that I don’t enjoy couponing enough, or save so much money by couponing, that it’s worth the time investment to me. I’d rather spend my time doing something else.

The one benefit I did earn from this experience is that I do closely review the sale fliers each week and only buy certain items when they are on sale. Diet Coke is a great example. We go through a 12-pack of Diet Coke cans every two days. If they are not on sale, they can cost $4.98 each or more. A good sale can bring them down to $2.50 to $3.00 each. So when they are on sale, I stock up. I buy enough to last until the next good sale. I keep them in the garage and bring them in as I need them. I figure if we use four 12-packs each week, that could save me $8.00 per week, which is $416.00 per year – just on Diet Cokes – something I buy anyway.

So I do try to be more conscious of sales on things we use every day, but the couponing thing just doesn’t work for me. I know some people are very successful at it, and I cheer them on. I even bring the coupon inserts from my Sunday paper in for others at the office to use. More power to you, extreme couponers! I’ll just watch on TV.

Kim versus the Eyelashes!

I will now share with you the embarrassing and sad story of me & my eyelashes.

My best friend in sixth grade was named Kathy, and she lived down the street from me. For some unknown reason, she had a habit of picking her eyelashes, actually pulling them out. She got me started doing this and I’ve done it ever since. Yes, I KNOW it’s weird. Like I said at the beginning, it’s embarrassing and sad.

My eyelashes are blonde to begin with, so they can’t really be seen at all without mascara. Unfortunately, mascara makes my eyelashes itch, which makes me pull them out even more. I rarely wear mascara anymore, so it looks like I don’t even have eyelashes at all. I do have a few – they are sparse after all these years, but they do still grow back.

To make matters worse, I have had eye problems, severely dry eyes, since my gastric bypass surgery two years ago. As a result, I’ve had to have punctual plugs put in both eyes. These are tear duct plugs, which keep your natural tears and eye moisture from draining out of your eyes and instead keeps the water/tears in your eyes. This causes my eyes, especially my right eye, to water a lot. Therefore, my right eye makeup and eyeliner disappears by mid-day every day. My left eye isn’t as bad for some reason, so I end up with one “beautifully” made-up eye and one bare one. Yes, of course, I have tried waterproof eyeliner and all the gadgets to make your eye shadow last all day. There must be something in natural tears that serves as a makeup remover!

So I tried false eyelashes. That didn’t work so well either. I wore them once to church and while we were standing and singing during worship, Artie started laughing and jabbing me. One of my lashes had come unglued and was barely hanging on. It was flapping around like a bat’s wing and I didn’t even feel it. I hurriedly yanked them both off in church and kept singing.

Amazingly, I did try them again after that experience. They have come unglued and made my eyes itch. I glued my eye shut once and had to use water and eye makeup remover to pry my eye back open. I finally found a brand I liked at Target and some decent glue. I have not, however, mastered the art of reusing them after I take them off, so it’s like $4.50 every time I wear them. I tried sleeping in them to save money and the next morning they were mashed flat against my eyelids. Not an attractive look.

I even went and paid $200.00 once to have eyelash extensions put on. It took about three hours and they glued individual lashes to my existing lashes. It looked really good for about two days, until one by one I picked all them out too. What a waste of money!!

I know I never should have started plucking out my eyelashes as a pre-teen. It was a bad habit, but there were worse habits I could have developed. Now my pale, tired-looking eyes are paying the price. (sigh)

To STEM or Not to STEM

STEM is the acronym for Science, Technology, Engineering & Math.
There is a new high school in Knoxville and it is located in the old L&N Train Station in the downtown area. They are having a contest to actually name the school, but it is currently referred to as the “STEM Academy.” The STEM is an acronym for Science, Technology, Engineering & Math. This is the first school of its kind in Knoxville or the region, and will have a stronger focus on those four subjects. There is also a higher technology focus, with students using iPads instead of textbooks. During the last two years of high school, the students will integrate with the UT campus and actually participate in college courses and internships.

Logan wants to go to the STEM Academy.

And you know that whenever Logan wants something, Kim & Artie try to make it happen.

Before I start filling out transfer papers and taking the steps to actually move him to the STEM Academy for his high school career (which amazingly starts next year!), I have taken a step back and am trying to give this much prayer and consideration. I usually just jump at Logan’s wishes and plow full-steam ahead. The STEM Academy and its rigorous curriculum and innovative style of teaching & learning will be a huge commitment, however, and I want to make sure we are ready for that – and that it is what Logan really wants.

One of the issues I am concerned about is Logan’s circle of friends. At least one of them is also hoping to transfer to STEM. Logan has a very close circle of about 8 friends that do everything together. They are on Xbox together every night, they socialize together, they have classes together, they text and talk on the phone. Logan is very dependent on this group of friends. He doesn’t like making new friends – he wants to keep his same tight circle. We have had a very hard time trying to get him involved with the youth at church or any other group or individual kid outside his circle.

I am concerned that the transition to such a different school atmosphere, in addition to not having his security blanket of friends around, may be too much for Logan to handle. He is a very bright kid and makes mostly A’s, a few B’s. He would be straight-A if he really applied himself, but he prefers to be A’s, B’s, and the class clown. He worries about his weight a lot and he often tells me about his circle of friends, “Mom, they know I’m fat and they don’t care. They like me anyway.” There are so many things wrong with that sentiment, but I don’t even want to dive into his psyche in this post!

I want what is best for Logan, as every mom wants for her child. Is it best to push him academically and encourage this STEM pursuit, while risking his emotional security? Or is it more important for him to excel in honors courses at a regular high school and stay in his comfort zone with his friends? High school is such a hard age – navigating friendships and too soon, dating, is hard enough without throwing additional obstacles in their paths.

While I wait for answers from God and continue to discuss this to death with Artie & Logan, I’d love to hear any of your input on the subject. What is best?

A Day in the Life of a Law Firm

My day starts fairly early, at least for an office job. Maybe I'm not as unique as I think I am (wink), but I do not know a lot of office managers that arrive at 6:30 a.m. My big boss (whom I will refer to only as "BB") is always here before me. He starts around 6:00 a.m. and leaves around 7:00 p.m., and doesn't go to lunch. There's never a reprieve around here.
We have our morning staff meeting at 7:30 a.m. on the dot. We review case files that are scheduled for review that day and assign any duties. Around 8:00 a.m., clients start to arrive in our office for their court appearances. The attorneys meet with their clients and then go to court in a big entourage walking down the street. It is only one block from our office to the courthouse.
While the attorneys are in court with their clients, the receptionist and I are left back at the office to "man the fort." Basically this is when all the real work gets done. There is a ton of paperwork involved in a criminal case, everything from community service work to driver's license paperwork to medical records. There are appointments to be made and new clients coming in. It's never really a quiet office, but I consider that a good thing. As long as it's not boring, the days usually pass quickly.
When BB and the other attorneys return from court, the chaos returns with them. There are long results letters to prepare and documents for the clients to take with them. The phones ring more often and more people come in and out of the office.
It seems there is never a moment's rest at the office, and BB doesn't like to chit-chat or socialize. He likes to WORK. And he likes for the rest of us to WORK. If you ever need a great attorney, he's your man. If you want a very hard-driven, workaholic boss, he's also your man. He doesn't take vacations or days off, or even sick days, so he doesn't really understand why his staff would want to do so.
I don't usually get a lunch break. I eat at my desk while working. I may get to leave every day around 5:15 or 5:30, so by that time I am exhausted and definitely ready to go home and see Logan & Artie. 10 - 11 hours straight is a long enough day for me, for sure!
I have my own office, with a door and everything. I have a great view of the stadium, the Tennessee River, the UT campus, the Sunsphere ... but I rarely have time to look out and enjoy the scenery. It is a very stressful job and a very tense atmosphere to work in. I long for a job where I'm just a minion and no one freaks out if I'm on vacation or heaven forbid, have surgery and need a few days off to recover. I guess I've just gotten used to the routine & the pay. And my best friend, Sara, is also a partner in the firm, so I get to see her every day. She makes it all bearable.
It's kind of a routine every day - morning meeting, court, afternoon appointments, but each day and each case brings something new. New persons who are suffering or embarrassed because of their offenses. New computer problems. New phone issues. New officers, new judges ... it's always something. I've worked in this office since 1996, so it's very hard to surprise me anymore. It's never a boring job!

Real Embarrassing Real Housewives Addiction

I know by the constant online chatter that I am not the only person suffering from this affliction. Those of you who are sensible and sophisticated and mature, I'm sure you would never let yourself be caught dead watching such trash as any Real Housewives program. Most of you are probably too busy to watch television at all, in between executive positions and raising brilliant future kings and presidents and growing your own organic food. But, for those of us who are lazy and simple-minded and need to get a life, pure entertainment can be found in the "Real Housewives" of just about any city.

My favorite of the wacky series is definitely the New Jersey series. Those girls are NUTS! I'd like to think I'm most like the wise voice of Caroline, but in truth I'm probably more like the volatile Teresa. Teresa's husband, Joe, is way too violent for my taste and his scenes make me cringe. Artie (who watches with me willingly, don't let him tell you otherwise) was a big fan of Dina, who left the show mid-season last year. He's very happy that she now has her own show on HGTV.

My second favorite is the Beverly Hills cast. I am quite sad over the recent suicide of Russell Armstrong, Taylor's estranged husband. Although I never liked him on the show, the line between REAL reality and the reality they play on TV is a thin line and it's very sad he felt so much pressure that he took his own life. I mean this sincerely. I do love Lisa vanderpump, though. Witty and wise. And Adrienne Maloof manages to stay above the fray and still be interesting. My favorite is probably Kyle, though. I love that she has a big family and has what appears to be a stable marriage..

I also love those southern charmers, the Atlanta housewives. Nene used to be my favorite, but I think that girl has taken the ego train and left the station. I like Kim because she is like a cartoon version of a normal woman. Kandi is the most reasonable one on the show, but she doesn't have much competition. Phaedra is a joke - she makes up Southern "traditions" that no one else has ever heard of.

Then there are my O.C. girls. I very strongly dislike Vicki. She wants the world to revolve around her, but she also wants to be the one spinning it. And she seems much older than the other girls on O.C., don't you think? Like 20 years older? Tamra grosses me out with her innuendo and trying to look like a 20-year-old. I think Alexis is incredibly beautiful, but I think she is naive. I admire that she professes on TV to be a Christian, even though like the rest of us, she sometimes fails to live like the best example. Gretchen seems fake, and Peggy seems like a social climber. I miss Lynn. She was always fun!

I had not yet formed an opinion about the Miami girls, except that I didn't like Cristi Rice. I never even had the desire to watch the D.C. version. I was a huge Real Housewives NY fan, but they took their bickering to such a low level that I completely quit watching in the middle of the most recent season. I think it's quite hilarious that they just fired 4 of the NY housewives! If women in my life acted like any of those ladies, I'd get away from them so quickly! I think they need to make a REAL real housewives, with the moms who change diapers and cook dinners and help with homework and never stop, who barely scrape by on a minimum budget and actually get along with their friends. Would you watch that?

It's a definite guilty pleasure, but this blog is about being honest and REAL, so there you have it - I admit it, I'm addicted!

25th Anniversary Trip Ideas

Our 25th wedding anniversary is coming up in December. 25 years is a LONG time and we are very blessed to have made it through all those years of sickness, health, good times & bad. For our honeymoon 25 years ago, we went to Gatlinburg to stay in a chalet. Once we arrived there, we realized that Artie's wallet had been stolen at the church DURING our wedding ceremony. (He took it out of his pants and left it in the men's dressing room because he didn't want an unsightly bulge in his back pocket during the ceremony). You just have to know Artie.
Anyway, we stayed in the chalet for 3 nights and then went to SC for a few days to visit with his family before we headed off to Virginia Beach to begin our married life. We had a great time at the chalet and it was very romantic, but it was a very short honeymoon and we were much more "broke" than we planned because of his missing wallet.
For our 25th anniversary, I really wanted to take a trip, just the two of us, to somewhere fabulous and have a second honeymoon. However, as is prone to happen, life just isn't working out to accommodate my plans!
Our anniversary is on December 6th, which is a Tuesday this year. We can't go anywhere that particular week because Artie will still be in school, finishing up fall quarter. Logan doesn't get out of school for winter break until December 23rd, so we really would need to plan our trip while he is out of school. That way Mom wouldn't have to rearrange her entire work/life schedule to take him to school every day.
However, that means we would have to take a trip over Christmas or New Year's. There are a few problems with that, as well. #1, travel during those 2 weeks is apparently very popular and therefore, VERY expensive. Flights to the Bahamas are three times more during those two weeks than any other week. Hotels are more expensive, as well. #2, missing the Christmas gatherings would NOT be a popular idea with either of our families; #3, if Logan is out of school for winter break, how guilty would we feel going somewhere fabulous and leaving him with MOM? I mean, Mom is great, but I'm sure Logan would not be thrilled to spend several days with his grandmother while we are lying on a beach somewhere; #4, I am not even sure I can get off work during that time frame because of course, everyone at the office wants days off around Christmas, and others in the office have to travel out-of-state for family just like I do. In a small firm like ours, it is very difficult for 2 or 3 people to be gone at the same time.
We have been scratching our heads trying to figure out a solution for this problem for several weeks now. We had really hoped to go to Atlantis in the Bahamas, but we really don't want to go there (for the very first time) without Logan. He has wanted to go there for ages. We thought of going back to Virginia Beach, where our married life began, but in December that is not exactly a "tropical" location. The timing, the location, the costs .... nothing is easy with this trip. I mean, 25 years deserves something special, right??!?
Any ideas out there?

And the winner is ........

Yvette Morris!! Yvette will be receiving a $100.00 gift card to Kroger. Thank you for reading my blog. :)
I also have decided to give $50.00 grocery cards to two more lucky winners. (Logan just loves drawing names out of the cereal bowl!)
Jodi Woods and Mindie Jennings, you have just each won a $50.00 grocery card. I'll need your store preference and mailing addresses please. Just send me a private FB message. (Or Mindie, I can bring yours to SC next weekend, just let me know!)
Thank you to everyone who reads and comments!
Let us all be very aware of those in our community who cannot afford groceries or necessities, and as the beautiful fall and Thanksgiving season approaches, let us all be willing to share our blessings!

The Praying Chair

There is a story behind this chair. It originally belonged to my mom's best friends' mother. Her name was Eula Gray Neely, and her daughters, Joyce & Linda, who have been Mom's best friends practically her entire life, gave it to Mom when Mrs. Neely passed away. Mom put it in her house and I loved sitting in it because it was so worn and comfortable. When I had Logan, Mom gave it to me to use as a rocking chair. I rocked Logan in that chair every single day and patted his little bottom until he would fall asleep or we both would.
After Logan grew out of the rocking phase I gave the chair back to Mom, but I always missed it. I recently begged her to give it back to me so I could put it in my craft room.
She finally brought it back to me a few weeks ago, after we measured the door to make sure it would fit into the craft room. We had to take the door off and put it back on, but we got the chair in! I immediately threw a couple of Mamaw's quilts over the back and voila - a comfy rocker to sit in my craft room and think up ideas, or look at scrapbooking or quilting magazines, or read, or watch the new TV that Artie put in there for my birthday.
However, the chair has taken on a new purpose. I sat down in it one night because I wanted some privacy to read the Bible and pray . It was right before school started back, because I remember praying for Logan to have a good year and for us to be wise in guiding him. I know the traditional way to pray is on your knees, but as I sat there in that chair and prayed, tears began to fall and I had one of my most earnest, heartfelt prayers in quite some time. Logan came in to say good night. He is accustomed to finding me in the craft room around bedtime, and he didn't think anything of opening the door to say good night. When he saw me crying he asked what was wrong. I told him I was just praying and he told me good night and went on to his room. Later that week, he found me in there again and asked, "Is that your new praying chair?"
From that time on, that's how I began to think of the ol' green chair - as the praying chair.
I sit there & rock and think of Mrs. Neely and how she must have sat in that chair and prayed for her daughters and her husband, who was a preacher. I think of Mamaw as I lean back into her quilts and how she used to pray for all of us (mostly me because I was clearly her favorite!{grin}) I always find solace in my craft room, but especially in that worn, comfy old chair. I imagine that chair has heard a lot of prayers over the years. Now it's hearing mine.

Grocery Giveaway!

How would you like to have $100 in free groceries? The winner of this giveaway will receive a $100.00 gift card to a grocery store (one in your local area). In honor of Logan preparing to volunteer at the Knoxville Free Food Market, I would like to help someone else have a well-stocked pantry.
To win just enter your name & local grocery store in the Comments section; or leave a comment with this post on Facebook.

The drawing will be on Saturday night!

What Happened to Common Courtesy?!?!

What is up with common courtesy? Has no one been raised with any manners? These are things that irritate me, in no particular order:

1. People who don't wave thank you after you let them over in traffic.
2. People who don't say thank you after you hold a door for them.
3. People who let a door slam in front of you rather than hold it open for you.
4. Kids who come into your house & get into your cabinets/fridge without asking first.
5. People who don't pull over to the side of the road when a funeral procession is passing by.
6. People who chew gum with their mouths open.
7. People who chew food with their mouths open!!
8. People who walk around in stores talking loudly about personal matters on their cell phones.
9. People who use bad words regularly during conversation and don't even apologize or acknowledge that it's rude.
10. People who cuss in front of children.
11. People who USE THE BATHROOM while talking to you on the phone!
12. People who don't say thank you when it's appropriate.
13. People who call your house during dinner hour or after 9:00 p.m. (unless emergency).
14. Bosses who call/email you in the evenings and on weekends for non-emergencies.
15. People who borrow things and never return them (i.e. books, clothes).
*People who are mean to my sister!*

Too Late for More Children

When Logan was born in 1998, Artie & I had been married for 12 years; I was 32 years old and Artie was 33. We really wanted a baby at that point and felt like Logan was our miracle child. He has been the greatest blessing to us and we love him beyond measure.
However, as any new parent knows, the first year with the first child can be a huge adjustment, especially for couples who have been married as long as we were. We were used to picking up and going whenever we wanted, wherever we wanted, and a baby certainly changed that.
Logan was a high-maintenance child from Day 1, never napping for more than an hour at a time, having to be held while he was sleeping or he would wake up, and never entertaining himself. (Yes, I realize these issues might be because we spoiled him so!) As he grew into a toddler, he would never play by himself and always wanted our undivided attention. As I have mentioned in previous blogs, my in-laws live out of state, and my parents only watched Logan on Thursday nights from 6:00 to 9:00. Those three hours were the only break we had. He hated riding in his car seat and one of us often had to ride in the back seat to hold his hand or entertain him in the car.
It was a major adjustment for us in our marriage. We went from having all the time alone in the world to no time alone. I was frazzled and stressed – trying to work from home and be a good new mom at the same time. Artie was frazzled and stressed – new fathers adjust to babies differently than new mothers do (and that’s all I’ll say about that).
Despite the adjustments, Logan was the light of our lives and we could not imagine loving another child as much as we loved him! How would that even be possible, we would say to each other.

I feel like I’m walking a thin line here between being enormously grateful for the opportunity to be Logan’s mom while also being honest about what a difficult adjustment parenthood was for us. As always, I’m trying to share my experience as honestly as I can. I realize sometimes that may not put me in the best light.
Anyway, we were adamant throughout most of Logan’s childhood that we did not want any more children. We felt that Logan was all we could handle, and all we needed. I had hoped for a boy with Artie’s looks and my brains, and that’s exactly what I got. God blessed us with a healthy son and we were so grateful. We felt like our family was complete.
Over the last 2 or 3 years, however, we have often discussed how we wish we had had more children. We feel we are too old now and there would be too much of an age gap between Logan and a sibling; plus Artie had a vasectomy after we both lost so much weight. One of the main reasons we sometimes wish we had more children is that we worry about Logan being lonely as an only child and not having a “built-in” playmate in a brother or sister. We also talk about how things might be when we grow older – will Logan take care of us? We also have been blessed with a roomy house and have two extra bedrooms that never get used. When my dad died, I was so grateful to have my sister to lean on and grieve with. She knew exactly what I was going through. When Artie & I are gone, Logan will be “all alone” in the world. He has cousins, but that’s not the same as a sibling.

Sometimes I’ll see a movie (The Family Stone comes to mind) where all the adult children are returning home for the holidays and bringing their spouses and children along. I think of my small family and it makes me sad. Kristi & I have one child each, and Dad is gone. So at holidays there are only seven of us total.

I had a boy name and a girl name picked out for years. (I didn’t use the boy name for Logan, which was Joshua Dayne – Joshua after a strong man of faith in the Bible and Dayne after my dad). My girl name was Grace Kathleen – Grace because I’m covered by it and it’s a beautiful word and Kathleen after my beloved Mamaw. I know that one child must have been God’s plan for us, and I’m perfectly happy with how things turned out. Logan is still high-maintenance and is certainly demanding enough for two or three kids. He says he likes being an only child – he doesn’t have to share possessions or our attention. We can always both attend his events and not have to split up and go with different kids. He has his own room and his own bathroom and most of the time runs the house.

There are arguments for both sides, as with any choice. If we had it to do over, we probably would have tried for more kids – but we are definitely very happy in our little family of three with our spoiled-rotten only child. We are very blessed just the way we are, and I thank God every day for allowing me to be a mother and to have Logan, my one-in-a-million child!

The Gospel Tent

The fair was always a big deal when I was growing up. My dad loved going to the fair, and The Dunsmores usually sang at the Gospel Tent at least twice every year. I remember parking the bus inside the gate and sitting there waiting for our time to sing. One year we had people knocking on the bus door asking for me & Kristi because they had seen our big red hair and thought we were The Judds. How funny that night was!

The Gospel Tent used to be located in a very central location, near the Jacobs Building and the Kerr Building. It was a large tent with plenty of folding chairs, and all the singing groups would have two sets a night, 30 minutes per set. The stage was large and there was plenty of space for the sound engineer to work. There were always two or three of those great church food booths nearby, as well, and the firemen did their tower demonstration across the walkway from the tent. There would be a full tent every night of the fair, and I always thought the Gospel Tent was one of the most popular entertainment draws of the fair.

Artie & I went to the fair last night to see both my sister’s group, CK3, and the Dante Praise Team, Rejoice, perform. The Gospel Tent is not a tent this year, but a shed at the top of the hill near the fair offices. The tent had previously been relocated to an area near the waterfront, kind off of to the side like an afterthought. Apparently there was flooding this year, which caused them to relocate it yet again to the top of the hill. I think it was hard for people to find this year. The Beeler family does a great job of booking groups to sing every night, and they have some very talented gospel performers lined up. However, I’m afraid no one is going to see them! Obviously times have changed in the 25 years since I used to play with The Dunsmores at the big Gospel Tent, but I was so saddened by the few people who showed up to hear gospel music, as well as how poorly the fair had advertised or notified the crowd that there was any gospel music and where to find it.

The crowd that was there certainly enjoyed the great performances by Rejoice, CK3, The Supernals, and the fourth group. I just wonder how many others would have enjoyed it if they had known about it. To me, the fair has always been largely about local flavor, in food, music, and demonstrations. Gospel music is definitely a local flavor in the East Tennessee area. I know I am a little bit biased, since I was in a gospel band for 20 years.

Artie & I had a great time, sampling a few bites of funnel cake and French fries and enjoying the music and performances. We talked to old friends and enjoyed the spirituality of the music. I left there feeling renewed and happy. I just wish more people could have reaped the benefits and left the fair feeling like I did!

Weekend Guilt

I want to know if I'm the only one who experiences "weekend guilt" come Sunday night. All during the week, I think of things I need to do around the house, or projects I need to work on in the craft room, or people I need to call, or errands I need to run. I even make lists (yes, I'm one of those list-maker people!) so I can check things off as I go.

However, once Friday night rolls around, I get weekend-itis and get super lazy. Artie, Logan & I will often go to a movie on Friday night to kick the weekend off. Saturday mornings, I lie in bed as long as I possibly can, and mentally go over my lists. I get up, get ready for the day, and once I get downstairs I end up on the screened porch or in the recliner. I start catching up on the TV shows recorded on the DVR or I get engrossed in some HGTV programming. Guilt starts to set in as I think of my lists ...

Artie is not a sit-arounder. He likes to be on the go and he likes to shop almost as much as I do. So we often end up running out on Saturday afternoons to do "errands," but instead end up at Ross, Marshall's, Target, having a nice lunch somewhere, the grocery store, and finally back home. I think this weekend we're going to try out the new Turkey Creek Public Market.
Sundays are usually church, naps, and leftover homework.
Then Sunday night rolls around and there are no check-marks on my lists! How does this happen? I mean, it is the weekend after all, a time for rest and rejuvenation. Maybe I shouldn't even make lists. Maybe I should just relax and not try to fill every spare minute of my time with something productive. What do you think? Is downtime okay? Can you sit around and be lazy on the weekends and not have to feel guilty about it?

Around My House

We love to add pieces to our home decor from all over the place - flea markets, yard sales, boutiques, online stores, family heirlooms - we enjoy the mix. One reader asked to see more of our home, so here are a few glimpses:

This beautiful piano was actually purchased at the KARM Thrift Store! Artie just happened to stroll in there one day when they had brought in some estate items, and this was one of them. I had always wanted a baby grand, and this one matches our living room decor beautifully. We had the ivories replaced and had it tuned a couple of times. It has a great sound. The only negative about the whole piano was how difficult it was to move. The thrift store does not deliver, so we hired a crew to come help Artie move it. It took six big grown men and they still almost didn't get it in the house!

Our master bedroom is done in very pale blue with white accents. We saw this handmade birdhouse at a yard sale and I had to have it! It weighs a ton. I love all the little nooks & crannies and the whitewash finish. The little elderly man who made it was so proud to sell it to us, and he said it had become so difficult for him to work with his hands that he no longer makes them. I'm glad we happened upon it when we did.

I love love love these big flowers from Bliss Home. I originally bought them to put in a very tall vase, because they had 5' stems. However, Artie, my very imaginative decorator, cut the stems off and made this horizontal arrangement and I love it. They are actually more gray than blue, but in the blue room they take on the cast of the wall. I love the size and the color of them.

Our guest bedroom is done in a bird theme. When I saw this adorable vase at Marshall's, I couldn't believe it. The right colors AND it had birds on it. I love finding little unique pieces like this to finish off a room. We have found some amazing items at Marshall's & Ross.

I love this comforter set with the embroidered birds, but probably my favorite piece in this room is the wooden picture with the metal birds. It is so fun to find unique items that we haven't seen anywhere else, and I knew the minute we found this that it would match the bedding perfectly! Sadly, our guest room has only been used twice in three years.

This cabinet is in the guest bedroom. I keep family things in here - a vase from my grandmother, her Bible from before she married, a toy I carried as a child, things that Artie & Logan have given me over the years. There is a set of ceramic birds in the cabinet that used to sit in my Mamaw & Papaw Dunsmore's living room window. There is a teddy bear I received in the hospital when I had Logan. A mug I picked up on a business trip to New York. An airplane made out of WWII bullet shells that my Papaw Valentine brought home from the war. So many trinkets ... I love to just stand and look at these items and remember special times & special people.

This candle from the screened porch has melted about an inch in this summer's heat!

I love this floral arrangement on the piano. It looks like one of Artie's creations, but we actually bought it at Marshall's. If you read my blog regularly, you'll see Marshall's mentioned quite often!

This beautiful table in the foyer came from the same estate as the piano. I fell in love with it as soon as I saw it. It fits so well in the foyer and adds a vintage quality. Mixed with the more modern painting on the wall, I think it's an HGTV-worthy look, don't you? lol (I keep trying to get Artie to audition for Design Star!)

Those Jogger People!

For any of you who are runners, or joggers, or speed walkers, God bless you. I admire your motivation and your athleticism. But it is really depressing to see you every day as I drive home from work or even worse, drive TO work, making me look bad. You always have on some coordinating jogging outfit designed for the best aerodynamics or whatever, but to me it just accentuates the lean muscles I don't have. And I have an iPod, too, thank you very much - but I don't have the add-on contraption that monitors my heart rate or counts my footsteps while I listen to the music. Men, I appreciate the glistening, well-defined chest muscles as you jog shirtless, but the glistening comes from sweat, which I REALLY don't like to do, and it makes me feel guilty seeing others so brazenly sweating in public.

I finally saw a, well I'll call her an exercise walker, who was more my speed this week. She was probably about 40 pounds overweight and her walking shorts kept rolling up between her legs as she walked. She would take a few steps and have to pull them out, take a few more steps ... you get the picture. She was not only sweating, but her face was beet-red and she looked as if she might pass out at any moment. I actually wanted to stop and offer her a ride. (I didn't).

I've even seen the super-dedicated all-weather joggers. They are like the Post Office, they run rain, snow, sleet or hail. It doesn't matter if their $200 jogging shoes are squishing in puddles. They somehow find warm clothes to run in that "wick away" the sweat underneath. They don't need umbrellas - they're too tough for that!
I always wanted to love exercise, but it hasn't happened yet. I'm still waiting. I love finishing an exercise or a workout. I love subscribing to exercise & fitness magazines. I love buying yoga pants. But I do not love seeing well-toned dedicated joggers who remind me of who I really am - the girl whose best sport in school was tug-of-war. ;)

(Images from iclipart.com (user subscription))

A Long Weekend at the Beach

Clearwater Beach is one of my favorite places on the earth. My family was introduced to Clearwater when I was 9 years old, and we went there for summer vacation every year. I went with the family until I was 21 and married, then went back with the family & took Artie in 1995. In 2000, we went again with the family and took Logan (at age 2). This was the only trip that included Logan and my dad, and I have great memories and great photos from that trip.
It's a tiny little island near Tampa, and it's definitely more of a family place than a "spring break" type destination. Lots of retirees live there, and almost all of the same little mom & pop stores & restaurants have lined the main street for as long as I can remember. You can go to the marina to board a pirate cruise, a dinner cruise, a fishing expedition, or simply to drop mail at the post office there. You can walk almost the whole island, and there is activity at the pier every single night, year-round.

We went at the end of June for our annual family vacation and took Mom, Kristi & her family. It was a fun trip, but my boss interrupted me several times and there were crises going on at the office that put a damper on my trip. This past weekend, Artie, Logan & I returned for the Labor Day weekend to just chill and enjoy family bonding time with just the 3 of us. Logan is definitely more interested in hanging out with his friends these days than his boring old parents, so we want to take every opportunity we can to spend time with him and keep that bond tight.

We had a GREAT time! Friday night Logan just had to order room service - he still thinks that's one of the coolest things ever. Artie & I walked over to a seafood cafe and had dinner outside. Saturday morning, Artie & Logan went deep-sea fishing and due to the choppy waters from the tropical storm in the Gulf, they both got seasick.

They did manage to catch a few fish, though. If you take your catch to a local restaurant, they'll cook it for you. I thought that was pretty cool, too! While they were fishing, I slept in and then went down to the beach by myself. I rented our umbrella & chairs for the day and just chilled & read my scrapbooking magazines. When they returned, Logan went in for a nap while Artie & I swam and got some sun.

We went to our favorite restaurant, Crabby Bill's, for dinner that night. Logan ordered and ATE the biggest crab legs I have ever seen!!

Sunday we were lazy and stayed around the pool or the beach all day. We ate lunch by the pool at the Sand Bar & Grill. They bring the food & drinks right to your pool chair!

Sometimes Logan wanted to go the room and watch TV or play on his iPad, but mostly we spent all of our time together as a family. We had actual conversations, laughed, and played together, and I think it was the best weekend I've had in a VERY LONG time! I can't think of two people I'd rather spend my time with, and having them all to myself was such a treasure. I'm so glad we went. Logan said it was enough family togetherness time to count for the next 14 years, but I won't let him off that easy. :)